What I hear when you say you’ll pray for me:
First, I hear that what you mean to say is, “I’m sorry this is happening to you.” Thank you. I appreciate the sympathy. It’s nice to know people care.
But then I also hear one of the following:
- Oh, God must have made a mistake. God’s good plan for life, the universe and everything has a bug. You shouldn’t have that problem. I’ll let him know and he can fix it right away. Or at least program a work-around.
- Yeah, that God, he’s kind of a miser with the kindness thing. You have to pay him plenty of adulation and beg real hard if you want anything good to happen. Maybe if a lot of us pray real hard he’ll decide to ease up on you. Maybe not, though. The good plan for life, the universe and everything might need you to hurt, suffer and despair.
- Oh, God must not have noticed there’s a problem here. I will make a quick call and fix that. Once he knows you’re suffering, he’ll fix it right quick. Or at least get down here and make you a cup of tea.
In other words, when you say you’ll pray for me, what I hear is that your god is either stupid, mean or just plain bad at his job.
This makes me feel worse for you than you feel for me. I know you mean to comfort me, not make me feel bad for you. So, when you say you’ll pray for me, I try to hear that. But, know what? Next time, you could just say “I’m sorry this is happening to you.”